Q: "Dad wants me to like his new girlfriend. I hate her. I want my Mom back. It’s his fault she left and now she has to live far away so she can work. I stayed here to finish high school. My Stepmom is bossy and is trying to be my new 'Mom' and I don’t want to have anything to do with her. I am so miserable I want to run away." (Jennifer, age 16)

A: Oh Jennifer. You have been through so much! Of course you want your Mom back. You probably never wanted this divorce to happen and the hard part is that you cannot change it back to the way you want it. It’s very painful to lose a parent you love and you may be very angry at your Dad that he didn’t work harder on their marriage. Very often though there is so much that parents don’t talk about with their kids (even their teenage kids) and it may be that your Dad had many reasons for leaving that he cannot explain to you. You can feel very sad about your Dad and Mom no longer sharing the same house; it means so many changes for you that you didn’t ask for. Do you think you and Mom or you and Dad can talk about how hard this is for you? Maybe one of them (or both of them separately) can talk to you about it. You get to be unhappy with these changes and cannot be expected to just like the way things are working out. Sometimes new Stepmoms try too hard to be the replacement mother. If you can talk openly with your Dad, he may be able to talk with her to help her not try so hard because of course, no one can take your Mom’s place.